A Forward Motion - CLH3785

[clh3785]

This is about kicking a drug habit and feeling very clean and free. Any opinions (good or bad) would be greatly appreciated.


A Forward Motion
It is on the horizon,
The sun sinks with each beat of my heart.
And they fly north for their time has come.
Each cloud is welcomed with open arms;
Because each silver lining is another reason to keep going.
With my feet in the sand, and my face towards the sky;
Arms stretched wide, i am ready to be freed.
The winds at my back urging a forward motion.
Stepping forward, the waves consume me whole
I can't breathe but my lungs have never felt so clean

The man now needs no crutch,
He sits legs crossed; and eyes closed
The wind at his back, urging a forward motion
Leaning forward, the world embraces him.
He can finally breathe,
He is finally free.

[mabrymusic]

for the most part i like this, but (no offense meant) it seems like it was written without much knowledge of what it's like to actually kick a drug habit...however, i could be full of shit on that one :)
was this written from personal experience?

[mabrymusic]

let me try a retort (from personal experience)

the motion eclipsed
it's as if i could never really feel
for everything i ever tried to help me feel more alive
feel more at peace
feel more real
never came the way i wanted it

there are pages of a life
which therapy cannot rewrite
which medication cannot overcome
and these are the depths of my soul
i could reach into
and pull myself inside out
for the world to see
are you hearing me?

so when i did succumb
to the venom i ate wholeheartedly
it was the only poison that satisfied
it was the only answer which was realized
and like everything else in my life
i knew no moderation
and neither did those around me

i watched friends die
i watched friends wither to places
their minds and bodies should never have gone

but a few of us made it out alive

when i reached that point
where i could feel my brain pulse
and my heart shake
i knew i'd gone too far
i knew the fun had finally run out
and no combination of whatever i could ingest
would fix me

so would i become the zombie my friends became?
would i become a victim all the same?
would i die on a high devoid of any shame?
somehow i had to break free
somehow i had to clear my name...

[clh3785]

hahhaa yours is a much worse

like drug addiction
mine was just a habbit,
when i stopped smoking i felt like i could breathe like i never was able to before.

[mabrymusic]

lol...yeah, funny thing...i've never been a cigarette smoker...but i did MAD drugs for a very long time...that's cool though...same feeling, diff. perspective

[clh3785]

well it happend a few times
when i stopped smoking cigarettes.
and just when i stopped smoking pot ( i smoked excessively, like two - three times a day, my life was kind of a blur) i cant remember much from my 8th grade - begining of sophmore year.

[jacjas_7]

I feel it is missing something. Like a better understanding of just which drug habit is being kicked. I think a good poem to write, would be one on kicking heroin. The crying out of the sores left by the needles, the marks all over the arms, all the scars that lie underneath the skin. The thrill of the high, the soul searching that comes from trying to dry out and the pain and hardship it causes the people around you. Will you live or will you die, will anyone care that you even try.

Never had a drug habit, but I do know what it is like to be stuck with needles all the time, almost everyday.

[clh3785]

see ive never done something that extreme.
and never will.

[jacjas_7]

I've wrote something almost that extreme to the point it made my wife think I was using. I just took my experience with needles (blood drawn) and blended that in with some dark music I was listening to at the time and came up with something very creepy, but could also be very real.