schloss21
21st-January-2008, 11:10 PM
Here are some pretty solid reasons why alcohol should be served at work...
It's an incentive to show up.
It leads to more honest communications.
It reduces complaints about low pay.
Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.
It encourages car pooling.
Increase job satisfaction because if you have a bad job, you don't care.
It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.
It makes fellow employees look better.
It makes the cafeteria food taste better.
Bosses are more likely to hand out raised when they are wasted.
Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.
Employees work later since there's no longer a need to relax at the bar.
It makes everyone more open with their ideas.
Eliminates the need for employees to get drunk on their lunch break.
Increases the chance of seeing your boss naked.
Employees no longer need coffee to sober up.
Sitting "bare ass" on the copy machine will no longer be seen as "gross".
Not having to worry about your wife being mad when you come home wasted - it's your job!
Any sick days taken would be completely genuine.
You can take longer and more frequent bathroom breaks.
It helps save on heating costs in the winter.
It reduces stress.
It cuts down on time off because you can cure hangovers, from the night before, with another drink.
Suddenly, farting during a meeting isn't so embarrassing.
It's an incentive to show up.
It leads to more honest communications.
It reduces complaints about low pay.
Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.
It encourages car pooling.
Increase job satisfaction because if you have a bad job, you don't care.
It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.
It makes fellow employees look better.
It makes the cafeteria food taste better.
Bosses are more likely to hand out raised when they are wasted.
Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.
Employees work later since there's no longer a need to relax at the bar.
It makes everyone more open with their ideas.
Eliminates the need for employees to get drunk on their lunch break.
Increases the chance of seeing your boss naked.
Employees no longer need coffee to sober up.
Sitting "bare ass" on the copy machine will no longer be seen as "gross".
Not having to worry about your wife being mad when you come home wasted - it's your job!
Any sick days taken would be completely genuine.
You can take longer and more frequent bathroom breaks.
It helps save on heating costs in the winter.
It reduces stress.
It cuts down on time off because you can cure hangovers, from the night before, with another drink.
Suddenly, farting during a meeting isn't so embarrassing.